Comments on: The Gifts of Sadness

By: Jackie

Jackie — Tue, 16 Oct 2012 04:47:18 +0000

Hi KArla,
Yes, you are right! It is grief…..I am wondering if one can feel grief towards a relationship because of realizing that we weren’t yet whole…and so our “performance” so to speak causes a sense of guilt (because of originally intending to be “good” or mature for the other) and grief for losing something (even if just a way of being or a once had closeness) or helping to create a loss based on that not yet being whole to begin with? if that makes sense….

By: Karla

Karla — Mon, 15 Oct 2012 22:59:31 +0000

Jackie, I wonder if you’re talking about grief, and not sadness? Sadness is the emotion that helps you let go of things that aren’t working anyway. Grief is the emotion that helps you mourn for something or someone that is lost irretrievably. With grief, you may need some sort of ritual or ceremony to fully let go of that which has been lost. I wrote about the process of a grief ritual in the book.

By: jackie

jackie — Sun, 14 Oct 2012 18:38:57 +0000

Karla,
how do we let go if there is a lot of fear, if holding on has become our greatest source of comfort?
i carry a deep sadness that is not seen or felt on the surface, but it pushes other people away, not wanting to be seen, heard or known….even though that is really what I want. I know it’s false, that it’s some habit or pattern, and that this act only causes more suffering, but it runs so deeply, so automatically. I have cried a lot, released a lot, but how do I let go completely, in my heart and surrender to life, instead of clinging to death?

By: SocraticGadfly

SocraticGadfly — Mon, 30 Apr 2012 02:33:27 +0000

Sometimes the sadness, even the tears, may come with out any “forcing”; I say, don’t resist, but listen after they’re done.

By: Karla

Karla — Mon, 23 Apr 2012 03:12:25 +0000

Welcome Jaime. Yes, people are not very awake to the gifts of sadness and grief, which makes the work of legitimately grieving people much harder than it needs to be.

Take care of yourself, breathe often and let your body relax, and know that you’re not alone!

Blessings,
Karla

By: Jaime Koehler

Jaime Koehler — Sun, 22 Apr 2012 16:41:58 +0000

Hi Karla,

I am going through a very painful divorce & I feel like most people I know are uncomfortable with my pain & it makes me feel very alone…a friend gave me the link to this article and it really helped so thank you!

By: Karla

Karla — Tue, 27 Mar 2012 15:45:30 +0000

Hi Jackie, it can be that sadness is preparing you for a future loss, but sadness also comes up in situations of great intimacy, when the thing we have to let go of (because it doesn’t work anymore) is our sense of isolation and separateness. Sadness is an all-purpose emotion, and it may be clearing you out for new delights!

By: Jackie

Jackie — Mon, 26 Mar 2012 23:39:11 +0000

I love sadness too, it really gives so much! After reading your post, I just made a connection about a few experiences and wanted to see if its true. While in a relationship or friendship, if sadness comes up, for no reason externally or no provocation, and then later or soon after the relationship comes to an end…..could it be that the sadness was signaling by way of intuition that the relationship was about the be let go of?

By: Karla

Karla — Sat, 25 Jun 2011 04:21:57 +0000

Yay Lennie! And from the other side of that, I'm moving this week and going through absolutely everything, and really seeing what I need and bagging up the stuff I don't. Interestingly, I'm much more prone to crying about things this week! I think my emotions are trying to help me. Let it go! Here's a great song for you when you're letting things go -- it's one of my favorites: Abbey Lincoln, Throw it Away

By: Lennie

Lennie — Fri, 24 Jun 2011 12:03:06 +0000

Hi Karla,
As a newbie to your work I realize now that I don’t need to be ashamed because of the huge sadness that I’m feeling…just need to let go of tons of clutter. Thanks Karla!