Is it empathy or projection?

posted in: Empathy | 2

Ten Ways to Identify the Difference I’m teaching the 3rd cohort of the Dynamic Emotional Integration® series this year, and one of the students had an excellent question about whether we can, in fact, be accurate about other people’s emotions. Are we able to accurately read the emotions of others, or are we simply projecting based on our own understanding? Some people make empathic accuracy difficult, … Read More

A Healthy Empathy® retreat at 1440 Multiversity!

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Healthy Empathy® How to Give Without Giving it All Away Karla McLaren, M.Ed and Tino Plank, MSN, RN November 24th to 26th, 2017, Friday evening through Sunday afternoon 1440 Multiversity in Scotts Valley, California $325 plus accommodations (see the 1440 Multiversity site for your options) 8.5 hours of Continuing Education credits are available (see below)   Health and healing professionals who demonstrate empathy provide better care with higher … Read More

The Art of Empathy Retreat at Esalen!

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The Art of Empathy Retreat at Esalen! Balancing Connection, Self-Care, and Healthy Intimacy October 1st to 6th, 2017 Esalen Institute in Big Sur, California Yes, you can get to Esalen! Empathy — for yourself and others — is a crucial skill at all times, and especially in times of trouble. Empathy is possibly your most essential skill, yet many of us struggle with it simply because we weren’t taught how … Read More

Healthy Empathy in Seattle!

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Healthy Empathy™ How to Give Without Giving it All Away Karla McLaren, M.Ed and Tino Plank, MSN, RN Friday & Saturday, September 23 & 24, 2016 Friday 7:30-9pm and Saturday 10:30am to 5:30pm $100 East West Bookshop in Seattle Continuing Education credits are available (see below) Register Now Empathy is possibly your most essential skill, yet many of us struggle with it simply because we were … Read More

Emotion work revisited!

posted in: Empathy | 21

I’ve had the opportunity to bring my work into the corporate world recently, and I’m having such a wonderful time! In Emotional Dynamics at Work®, we’re working on emotions, empathy, and the crucial concept of emotion work, and I want to share it with you. Understanding emotion work In her groundbreaking book, The Managed Heart: Commercialization of Human Feeling, sociologist Arlie Hochschild (pronounced hoke-shilled) described what … Read More

Are you an empath?

posted in: Empathy | 108

Hello! After studying empathy and emotions for four decades, I’ve developed a very simple and accurate way to tell if you’re an empath. Are you ready to find out? Karla McLaren’s Amazingly Accurate Quiz for Empaths Question 1: Are you breathing? Yes/No (choose one) Yes? You’re an empath. No? Take a breath and start over at Question 1. (spoiler alert) Congratulations! You’re an empath! That’s a … Read More

The difference between deep empathy and niceness

posted in: Empathy | 12

When people think of empathy, they tend to see it as a soft skill — as a yielding and pleasing kind of behavior. They think: If you listen to me and agree with me and make me feel good, that’s empathy. If you fix my problems and soothe everything, that’s empathy. Empathy equals niceness. But there’s actually a deeper form of empathy that transcends mere niceness … Read More

The difference between healthy empathy and martyrdom

posted in: Empathy | 16

Balancing empathy for others with empathy for yourself When I talk about empathy, I tend to use the words healthy and intentional a great deal of the time.  If your empathy is unintentional, and you’re not sure how it works, it can be very easy to enmesh yourself with other people’s emotions and needs — to the extent that you ignore your own.  You can lose … Read More

The difference between empathy and enmeshment

posted in: Empathy | 40

Hello fellow empathic people! Did you know that there’s a distinct difference between healthy empathy and enmeshment? I’ve spent a lifetime exploring how empathy works, how it goes awry, how we can understand it more clearly, and how we can create a ground for self-care and self-empathy within our everyday lives. I’ve also been looking at an idea about empathy that goes something like this: Empathy … Read More

The Six Essential Aspects of Empathy, Part 6: Perceptive Engagement

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Perceptive Engagement! Perceptive Engagement can be considered the pinnacle of your empathic skills, because it relies upon all of your first five aspects of empathy and helps you connect with others in truly supportive and workable ways. So far, we’ve looked at the first five of your Six Essential Aspects of Empathy. Today, we’ll look at the culminating aspect, which occurs when all of the aspects … Read More

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