The gifts of joy: Radiance and splendor

Welcoming Joy! After learning about each of the emotions one by one (you can find the list of emotions on my Start Here page), we arrive today at the final emotion in the happiness group: joy! Joy is different from happiness in that it is deeper and larger somehow. It is closer in its essence to contentment, but instead of coming forth after an achievement (as healthy … Read More

The gifts of contentment: Appreciation and recognition

Welcoming contentment! We just looked at happiness as a wonderful emotion that looks outward, or forward to the future, with hope and delight, and now we come to our friend contentment, which is a form of happiness and pleasure that turns inward, toward you, and says, “Hey, good job!” (Excerpt from The Language of Emotions): Happiness tends to anticipate a bright future, while contentment tends to … Read More

The gifts of happiness!

We arrive at happiness! Happiness helps you look outward (or forward to the future) with hope and delight! As I’ve been posting about the emotions one by one, you may have noticed that when I talk about emotions, I almost never start with the happiness-based emotions. It’s not that I don’t like happiness; I do! It’s that the three different types of happiness I identify in … Read More

Grief: The deep river of the soul

Grief is a beautiful, languid, and powerful emotion that is very different from sadness. Sadness arises when you’re holding on to something that isn’t working anyway; sadness arises to help you relax and let go. Grief is different: it arises when something is lost irretrievably, or when a death occurs – be it actual death, or the death of important attachments, ideas, or relationships. Grief does not simply … Read More

The social genius of jealousy and envy

Welcoming jealousy and envy! Jealousy and envy need a hearty welcome, because they are perhaps two of the most hated (and valenced) emotions in the entire emotional realm. This is a tragedy, because jealousy and envy are actually essential for our social survival — we really need them! Luckily, we can work with jealousy and envy empathically and shield ourselves from the deeply unfortunate things we’ve … Read More

The twisted love inside hatred, revisited!

The twisted love in hatred Previously, we looked at the connection between hatred, disgust, and rage. Rage is the aggressive aspect of hatred that can make you obsess over your hate targets and project all sorts of troubling material onto them. The fascinating thing about hatred is that you actually choose your hate targets not simply because they’re odious, but because they’re specifically odious in ways that … Read More

Embracing your hatred and saving the world

Hatred: The Shadowy and Necessary Emotion As we take a tour through the emotional realm, we’ve started with the emotions that help you set boundaries: Anger, guilt and shame, and apathy (the mask for anger). Now, we’ll look at an emotion that can set boundaries in very troubling ways if you don’t know how to work with it: hatred. Actually, we’ll continue to look at hatred … Read More

Karla McLaren celebrates 1000 Ausome Things #AutismPositivity2013

Hello Ausomeness! We’ve come to the end of Autism Acceptance Month, and now we’re embarking upon Autism Acceptance Year, Decade, Century, and Epoch! Heck, let’s just call it Autism Acceptance Eon! I’m being silly, but I’m also being very serious. Now that we’ve become somewhat clearer about what autism is and how many different ways it manifests, we’ve realized that there are a lot of autistic … Read More

You don’t have to be blue!

Today is International Autism Awareness Day, but I have to say, if you’re not aware of autism yet, friend, where have you been? My friends in the autism community find this day pretty excruciating, because the message about autism is so bleak and panicky — on this day, people mistake a disorder for a disease and a community of real, live human beings for an epidemic. … Read More

Understanding multiple emotions

 The Wonderful World of Multiple Emotions! There are four ideas about emotions that are widely shared and accepted — yet are absolutely problematic. These four commonly accepted ideas actually prevent you from being able to approach your emotions — or anyone else’s — intelligently. They are: The problem with valencing (imagining that there are positive or negative emotions, or pro-social or anti-social emotions) The problem with … Read More

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